Aphantasia and the Difference Between Us

How a scientific discovery changed how I understand my wife and myself. 3 minute read.

In 2016, I realized my wife and I are fundamentally different.

I had recently learned about aphantasia, a condition where people can’t see mental images when thinking. It sounds preposterous, but it’s real and affects about 4% of people.

To explain it, I’ll need you to take a simple test:

1. Clear your mind

2. Think of someone close, like a parent, sibling, or friend

3. Picture their face

Can you see their face in your imagination?

For most, mental images feel automatic. For others, they never appear, or only partially. That’s aphantasia. Some people do not “see” visuals while thinking.

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Close to Home

This 2015 article (gift link) about aphantasia by Carl Zimmer was the first time aphantasia made the news. I mentioned it to my wife, Sachi, and said, “You know how you can imagine something like an apple in your mind?” Her response surprised me. She said, “Wait. You can actually do that? You can see the apple? I thought it was a metaphor.”

It turns out she has always had aphantasia.

She remembers people and events, but can’t summon images of them in her mind. If she witnessed a crime, she couldn’t describe the person to a sketch artist.

We talked about it for years. I realized her everyday reality is fundamentally different from mine, and neither of us knew it. Learning about aphantasia felt like unlocking a new level of understanding between us.

For example, Sachi has never enjoyed reading fiction. I assumed it was personal preference, but aphantasia plays a role. How would it feel to read a novel and not visualize the characters or scenes in your mind?

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Minds Are Blown

Blake Ross, co-founder of the Firefox browser, had a similar revelation after reading Zimmer’s article. He wrote:

I have never visualized anything in my entire life. I can't "see" my father's face or a bouncing blue ball, my childhood bedroom or the run I went on ten minutes ago. I thought "counting sheep" was a metaphor. I'm 30 years old and I never knew a human could do any of this. And it is blowing my goddamned mind.

If you tell me to imagine a beach, I ruminate on the concept of a beach. I know there's sand. I know there's water. I know there's a sun, maybe a lifeguard. I know facts about beaches.

But I cannot flash to beaches I've visited. I have no visual, audio, emotional or otherwise sensory experience. I have no capacity to create any kind of mental image of a beach.

Ross isn’t alone. Ed Catmull (Pixar’s co-founder) and Craig Venter (human genome pioneer) also have it. So do at least four of my friends.

Aphantasia isn’t a disability; it’s a difference in experience. Most people, especially throughout history, never knew they were different. Or, they sensed something was different but couldn’t explain it.

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We Are Different

Discovering Sachi’s aphantasia made me think deeply about how differently we all experience daily life. Neither of us knew she was different. Now we use that understanding in daily life. For example, I’ve learned that a diagram or drawing works better for her than a verbal description. This difference, once understood, allows us to optimize.

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An Epiphany

One thought stuck with me through it all: If Sachi lived her entire life not knowing she had aphantasia, what am I missing?

Could my own experience differ from others in ways I haven’t imagined? Could we all be wired differently and not know it?

This was the beginning of the Vibes Project. Aphantasia was the gateway drug; a reminder of how little we know about what it’s like in other people’s minds. This sort of neurodivergence is a cornerstone of the project. By understanding how our brains are different, we can get closer to answering the question: Why are we the way we are?